Los 5 Lenguajes Del Amor De Los Ninos / The Five Languages Of Love For Children

ISBN: 0789905086
ISBN 13: 9780789905086
By: Gary Chapman

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Reader's Thoughts


I thought this book had some great insights. It has lots of things that we should already be doing to show love to our kids. Just a great reminder that not all kids are the same and that there are simple things we can do to reach the needs of each different child. I agreed with the philosophy behind it and I got a lot out of it.


An excellent book for anyone who is married, engaged, or has children. What is your love language, and do you speak the same love language as your spouse? Or are you doing acts of love and he/she acts as if they don't care or appriciate them, then maybe you are not speaking their primary love language.


This was a great book! Loved how it talks about each of the love languages with children in mind. Also gives some good ideas on how to figure out what your child's love language is. For my full review check out...http://soldierswifecrazylife.com

Adriane Devries

As parents, it is our duty alone to discern which love language (physical touch, quality time, gift, acts of service, and words of affirmation) is best suited to each of our children. Though we of course love our children, how we communicate this love is not necessarily how they receive it, and therefore our language may go unheard, leaving their “love tank” empty. Learning these new languages will take work and discomfort, but worth the effort to enable them to mature in their ability to learn and relate to others without resorting to the typical passive aggressive measures that look like disobedience but are inadvertent cries to snag whatever love/attention possible. Though children “know when you don’t feel loving…they experience your love behaviorally.” They are “more grateful and appreciative when you’re able to be loving, no matter how you feel inside.” This author purports that if more parent purposely learned their children’s language and began speaking these languages fluently, our society would not be where it is now. Very intriguing and worth more research.


I don't like this book very much. Gary Chapman co-wrote this book with someone named Ross Campbell, and I have the impression (perhaps the wrong impression) that they are Campbell's parts of the the book that are giving me trouble. Love languages--good. But I have the constant feeling while reading this book that while they are giving with one hand, they are taking everything away with the other. This makes me feel like the love stuff is rather wishy-washy, and the discipline stuff is entirely child centered. Am I using that phrase correctly? In other words, Campbell seems to say that the parent is entirely responsible for the child's behavior, but the only power the parent has to channel that behavior is to use the love languages. Anything else has to be initiated by the child. They've really muddled up my own practice of discipline.I firmly believe that all discipline must arise out of love, and that we as parents have the responsibility of doing what is best for the child in the long run, not just what seems good for the moment. This part of their argument I can agree with. Unconditional love--again, I agree. But there seems to be no way to encourage first-time obedience under Campbell's program, and this bothers me. I don't want to control my child. Far from it. At the same time, he needs to learn how to obey, not because he feels like it, but because it is right to do so. I feel like Campbell's advice takes away any ability I have to train my children in that.

Brandy Ferrell

The Five Love Languages of Children has certainly given me some specific ideas for more adequately expressing love to my children. Not only that, it is helping us as a family to communicate better with one another. Our three boys have enjoyed learning about the Love Languages with me, which was completely unexpected but absolutely wonderful! This book is a very good, quick read but is also quite convicting. Even in expressing love to my children, I have realized that at times even my best intentions have actually become a burden to them. Much of this book rings true for me personally, though I don't always fit the mold. The main point of the book is that we have several ways to express love to one another, and while some may feel loved through certain expressions, others may not. It's important to recognize that!And… I have determined that I'm not so mature in handling anger and expressing love, but now I have some specific ideas to help me become a better parent. 1 Peter 4:8


The Five Love Languages has so much good information in it, but I didn't feel that the Five Love Languages OF CHILDREN added very much to that. It might have been more useful had my children been older. I was interested in what it had to say about discipline, but obviously disciplining a teenager is different than disciplining a preschooler and the discipline information in the book seemed to be for someone a little more rational than a three year old. I don't think I'm going to be able to hold onto that information for the next ten years. I'm generally leery of any parenting book that throws around the phrases like "will cause lasting and irreversible damage," referring to the child as a result of something a parent does or does not do. It was especially strange in this book because it was never talking about anything blatantly harmful. No parent is perfect and there are quite a few functioning adults in the world, so I don't know how much there really is that can't be undone. Just love your kids, people.If you were only going to read one of these Love Languages books, I would go for the basic one over the child-specific one.


This outstanding book addresses how each child expresses and receives love through one of five main "languages" - quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch. Although children need to be spoken to in each of these love languages, there's one love language that meets their deepest emotional needs and should be used often with them. Once we figure out what our children's primary love language is, we will be able to better understand their personal communication methods. Even though children need to feel love through all five of the love languages, their primary love "tank" must be filled in order for the other languages to be effective.They also offer excellent suggestions with disciplinary methods that won't affect your child's perceptions of the way they feel loved by their parents.Bottom line - Even if you've read tons of parenting books, you will truly learn something new from this one - something to increase your relationship with your child.


I found the five love languages for adults to helpful. This book is very similar, but related to children. The first half of the book is specific to the five languages, the second half (which I enjoyed more) deals with discipline, love, anger, and the love languages for your children. I am excited to try some of the ideas mentioned in the book. The only complaint is that some of the ideas leave me with specific questions for specific circumstances and how you would do that on a daily basis. I also came away with the question, how can you make your child feel love unconditionally? It has made me think a lot the last couple of days how I want my children to feel that and how I can be better at showing it.

Lindsay Loughlin

I really liked this book. The theory is that there are 5 love languages and by figuring out your child's primary love language, you can figure out how they best perceive and feel love. Without even reading the descriptions, I could easily figure out my oldest son's primary love language. The books says if your child is under 5, you probably won't be able to tell their primary language yet so I am interested in trying to pick up the clues as the twins get older.


This book argues that all people feel love in five basic ways, but we each have a primary love language. The best way to make your children feel loved, then, is to figure out what their primary love language is, and give them lots of that, plus regular doses of the other kinds. Obviously this applies to spouses, parents, and anyone else you love too, but this book is mainly about the parent/child relationship. I may decide this book deserves 4 stars after I've had some more time to think about it and try its ideas out. It was really interesting, but also sometimes frustrating. Nick's primary love language is quality time, which I already knew, but it was admittedly nice to see it spelled out here, with suggestions for how to give him what he needs. On the other hand, I would have liked some more specifics on how to make him feel loved without making me feel overwhelmed by his constant presence, but I guess that's something I need to think out consciously myself.


My oldest child is much like me, but my second felt so different! But for the first time I'm understanding him, and this book may be the difference between a close relationship with him during these formative years, and a distant one.This is the best parenting book I've read. In a nutshell: everyone shows love and desires love in return, but we do it in different ways. Those "ways" are called languages, and are condensed into five types. Receiving love in YOUR language fills your love tank. Kids whose love tanks are full learn better, are disciplined more easily, and manage anger more appropriately. A great analogy for the whole thing: Someone can be screaming as loud as possible in Chinese, but if you don't speak Chinese, you're not going to understand them.


In the Evangelical tribe I grew up in, The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman provided the idiom to talk about how each us receive and give love. Because of our unique personalities and family of origin, we each have modes of expressing love which is particularly meaningful to us. For some it words of affirmation. Others feel particularly loved when you spend quality time with them. Giving and receiving gifts is another ‘love language.’ Others feel loved through physical touch or acts of service. My love language is gift giving (so keep them coming ;P ). Chapman’s original book has helped countless people understand their own love needs and how to best express love to their mates (and other loved ones) whose ‘love language is often different from their own.I don't typically read ‘spin-off’ books. The fact that there is a Love Language book for singles, men, children, teenagers etc, seems a little too much like “Chicken Soup for the Cat-Lover’s Soul.” It is more of a marketing ploy than something you expect to say something new. But then I am the father of three very different children and thought that The 5 Love Languages of Children would provide me with some insights on how to love my children well. I was pleasantly surprised by what I read inside. This is a great book.While Gary Chapman and his co-author, Ross Campbell, M.D., say that it is impossible to identify a primary love language for kids under the age of five, and warns that love languages can change at various stages, I gained some appreciation for the uniqueness of my three year old needs and some understanding of my five year old. My two-year-old son is still a mystery.Chapman and Campbell devote the first half of this book to describing the five love languages and how to recognize them in your children. In the last half of the book they describe how to discipline children, foster learning and help children manage their anger by responding to them in ways which ‘fill their love language’ when we give direction or correction. They also discuss some of the unique challenges of responding to a child’s love language for single-parent families and how modelling love languages in marriage helps your children.This is a quick read with a lot of insight. Every involved parent loves their children (hopefully!); however not every child feels their parent’s love. This book helps parents understand their children and offers sage advice on how to nurture them in love. My oldest daughter seems to have a primary love language of Quality Time and loves it when you spend time with her. My almost four year old, I would guess has a preference for acts of service. She loves it when you do things for her in a way that her independent older sister never did. This helps me respond with greater patience when she has me help her with something she is quite capable of. And of course Chapman and Campbell also encourage parents to nurture your children to express each of the love languages to others.But the most important chapters for me would be the chapters on discipline, learning and managing anger. My kids are unique with different personalities and I have learned that what works with one kid will not work with the others. Certainly there is a lot I still need to discover about my children but like the original Love Languages book, this gives me some words to talk about it.I recommend this book to parents. It may be a spin-off but it delievers the goods. I give this book four stars. : ★★★★☆Thank you to Moody Publishers for providing me a copy of this book in exchange for this fair and honest review.


I did find this book helpful in some ways, and frustrating in others. While it was beneficial to learn the different ways a child feels loved and the authors did offer some approaches to behavioral issues that have already been beneficial, I just don't think that knowing a child's love language and "filling their love tank" will solve ALL of a child's behavioral problems as the book suggests. I felt the authors put too much responsibility on the parent for a child's behavior. While I definitely feel as a parent I do have a lot of power and influence on my child, ultimately how he/she acts is not entirely up to me or within my control and the child makes the final decision as to how he/she behaves. It was helpful to add this info to my parenting arsenal, I just don't think life is as tidy as the book suggests.

Joshua Park

With any book that's designed to help parents be better parents for their kids, it's easy to fall into the trap of defining the success of the book by whether its advice was successful in the reader's family. The fact that every child is different is actually the highlight of this book. This helps people understand why two kids might react completely differently to the same gifts, the same activities, and the same punishments. It has to do with how the people involved show and express love.Most of the explanations from this "5 Love Languages" book were more instructive to me than the examples from Gary Chapman's main book in this vein, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate.One problem: I expected this book to help with my toddler. In the book, Chapman and Campbell say that if the child is under the age of 5 that I should just not try to figure out the love language. They also say that parents should not discipline or punish the child with methods related to the child's love language. (E.g., a child in dire need of Quality Time could be emotionally damaged by punishing them with isolation.) This presents a problem: I am not to discipline in my child's love language, but I can't know what my child's language is until he's older? Should I simply hope that my discipline tactics are not in the same language as my son's understanding of love?Sadly, the authors do not offer a solution to this. It seems that the book is geared primarily toward school-aged children. Still, the advice seems good and I'd hate to fault the book with a lower rating simply because of the book's scope. I wish the publisher had clarified the appropriate age range of the book in its list description.

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